Be Careful What You Wish For

July 27 11 pm

Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water/blog..... yes, you've had two solid days of coherent blogging......two days of elegant humor beautifully woven together with clear concise facts.......you rejoiced secretly as not to hurt my feelings.....now, as you read, the realization overwhelms you and you scream out loud NOOOOOOOO, he's back!!!!! Now you'll, once again, be forced to sift through random movie quotes and endure painfully vague metaphors in order to decipher what is actually happening with the boys. Well, get out your pocket Rosetta Stone cuz here come your hieroglyphics!!!!

The corrolation between your senses and your memory has always fascinated me. We've all experienced it.....you'll be simply minding your own business when suddenly a random scent or song will catapult back in time to a specific event or meaningful feeling. You are powerless against it.....your mind instantly transports you back to a time, specific event or the memory of a specific person.....you are there and it is as real as the first time you experienced it. Your senses make up a large part of who you are. I play with the corrolation between music and memory at work all the time. I'll play a specific song each time a specific event occurs......every extended lunch starts off with the same song, every football game warm up begins with the same song and every final campfire at the end of the year in student government ends with the same song. I've had multiple former students that I will see after graduation tell me of the same expenrience. They will be driving in thier car and hear one of these songs and instantly be reminded of that event from high school. Seeing a completely accurate picture of something pales in comparison to actually being able to touch it, to smell it, to taste it or to hear it. Sound is particularly keen with my memory. Sound is what touched me today. I heard a sound that I will never forget as long as I live. It was faint....it was barely audible......but it was present.....and it was the first time I heard what I've been longing to hear for almost five weeks. I heard the sound of my son's voice. It was barely a squeek......barely a faint cry......in fact I had to put my ear up to the open hole that is intended for arms to pass through in order to hear it.....but there it was....in all it's glory......that little squeek that was my son crying.......it was beautiful.....it was music to my ears.....it is what I have been waiting for for four weeks and six days. Now I know......believe me, I'm grounded enough in reality to know that every single one of you out there with kids is laughing right now and saying "be careful what you wish for"!!! I know that there will be a day (probably in the near future) that I am pleading with them to stop crying......searching frantically for the source of their discomfort, so that I may rectify the situation to gain a moments peace and quiet......I know that two infants crying in the middle of the night will become the bain of my existence.....but for now....for today.....it is exactly what I've been waiting for.......I looked at my beautiful wife and saw the tears welling up in her eyes while simutaneously grinning from ear to ear......I felt this complete feeling of joy well up inside of me......I felt blessed and full of love.........see, some of you may have already figured it out......some of you may have already put the puzzle together.....for those that haven't let me enlighten you.........you see, the only way that my son can cry.....the only way for him to make noise at all is if his vocal cords are not being obstructed by a breating tube......yes......that's right......he is no longer on the vent.....he is no longer intubated......there is no longer a breathing tube crammed down his throat.....he has been extabated.....he is now on CPAP!!!!! This is the monumental milestone that I have been waiting for!!! He still needs help breathing. The CPAP ( constant positive airway pressure) delivers a constant flow of air into his lungs. It keeps his lungs from completely exhaling (think of blowing up a balloon.....once blown up, let out most but not all of the air.....it's a lot easier to blow it up again if it is not deflated all of the way). He is breathing almost entirely on his own, but still needs some assistance from this device that is delivering air pressure through little tubes in his nostrils. This is huge!!!!! By now you're probablly saying "John you idiot!!! You haven't said who.....you haven't told us which one is on CPAP!!! Is it Tyler or Parker" Well, my astute friends and family, that ommission was by choice......I deliberately omitted the specific name of which son so that I may surprise with with even better news.........IT IS BOTH OF THEM!!!! At 9 am this morning Parker made the transition, followed shortly thereafter by Tyler at 1 pm. Both boys have had two blood gasses since then that have both been stellar!!! Both my boys have one less tube in them.....one less obstuction.....one less vehicle for infection to invade their little bodies!!! Today was a great day........a great day to come back from missing them from for two days.

VANILLA LATTE

This next piece of information needed it's own title. I still have not jumped on the Starbucks craze. I still do not drink coffee. However, through first hand observation every single day at school, I can personally attest to the fact that caffeine is, by no means, an adult vice. It is as common among the teenage population as fast food and bottled water. Caffeine, that wonderful stimulate that is present in large quantities in coffee is steadily creeping its way down the ages to people younger and younger than before. I am here to say it has reached the micro-preemie stage of it's decent. Yes both Tyler and Parker had their first vanilla latte yesterday and are already on a steady diet of the magic elixer. Breast milk and caffeine are now both staples in thier daily routine. They are both being given caffeine each day. Apparantly it aids in respiration and is necessary to help them with their transition off of the breathing tube. All I have to say is if they aquire a Starbucks habbit, they better learn how to mow lawns pretty early, cuz i refuse to financially support two more people in this household hooked on Starbucks (in Heather's addiction defense she a) finances it herself and b) gave up coffee completely upon becoming pregnant and is still off of it while breast feeding....that a baby Honey!!!)

Okay, so this blog has gone on forever, and I'm exhausted (taking forty teenagers camping for two and a half days will do that to ya!!!). So, I'm off to bed........I knew better than to go to bed without an update. Tommorow is Monday and I know that one or two of you just may be checking this tomorrow morning.......before work of course!!!